MOTHERHOOD IS A MINISTRY

So I have come to realize it is incredibly hard to sit down and focus and write a blog post with a 5 year old and 20 month old running around. It's ironic that this Sunday is Mother's Day because I have been feeling a little burned out lately. You know when you haven't had a break from being a mother in oh say..... weeks? Sometimes I feel like I am not a very good one at that. I am not patient  (at all), a perfectionist to say the least, and frankly sometimes I want to go in my bedroom and close the door and scream to the top of my lungs. How's that for honesty?
On 106.9 last night they were talking to this woman, Erin Davis. She is 32, has 2 kids, & 1 on the way. She wrote a book called 'Beyond Bath Time: Embracing Motherhood As A Sacred Role.' During her interview she said, "Motherhood is a ministry." Essentially, as mothers, we are missionaries. Sharing the gospel with our young children and raising them up to be a light in this dark world. My job is to equip them to be ready for what the Devil has to throw at them.
Another thing Erin said was that she is overwhelmed a lot! I found this to be encouraging (especially since she is adding baby #3 to the chaos). Wow.....I am not the only one!!  I want more children (obviously if you read my last post) and I sometimes do ask myself if I can handle more. So because I get overwhelmed on occasion does that mean I may not be cut out for the big family I desire? Does that mean I should just stop at 2 because it's not always a walk in the park? I am not a quitter and when the going gets tough I refuse to let the Devil scare me into bailing on my calling. He knows exactly where our weak spots are and he takes every opportunity to cast doubt & fear. He makes me feel inadequate and not good enough. The best part is.... I am a child of God and the Devil doesn't stand a chance against Him.
I am broken and I cannot do this Mommy thing on my own. I can't all of a sudden be a patient person and I can't let the imperfections not annoy me. I need Christ and He is going to see me through the hard times. When we adopt and bring more children into our home it is going to get harder. But that just means we are going to have to lean on God even more! 
No matter how overwhelmed I feel the good still outweighs the bad by a landslide. To see Alexa's face light up when I enter the room, to hear Austin say "Mommy I love you", or to see how sweet they are to one another and how they adore each other. All that reminds me that the hard times are soooo worth it. I have plenty of love to give them and I even believe I can love another child that is not biologically mine just as much as I do my own. So does that mean I can't have a crazy Mommy moment or that I have to be this perfect mother that does everything right and is the image of pinterest? No way! We are way too hard on ourselves and each other. Constantly comparing how good of a mom we are to someone else or how well behaved our kids are. I label myself a failure if by dinner I realize my kids haven't had a single vegetable yet that day. Let me be honest here, some days I am lucky to get macaroni and cheese or a peanut butter and jelly sandwich made. I am working on not holding myself to such an unreachable standard.
This Mother's Day I am proud of the Mother that I am despite my downfalls. I am grateful that God chose me to be a Mom to Austin & Alexa and grateful that I still have my Mom to spend this weekend with.
So have a great weekend everyone and remember those in prayer that don't have their Moms here on Earth to spend the day with and those that dream of motherhood but it just hasn't happened for them yet. A great day for some may be a horribly painful day for others.

"Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb a reward." Psalm 127:3

Stay tuned.... next week I will return to my confirmations on our mission trip to Africa.