Can I just say I am utterly amazed at God right now?! My last blog post, my testimony, was viewed by OVER 1,250 people! I am not a big blogger. I may post a blog once a month (if that) and its usually just if there is something really on my heart to share. So 1,250 views on one post is pretty major for me and FAR exceeds any other post by a land slide. I translate that into over 1,250 that heard the gospel spelled out in the form of a life that was transformed by the blood of Jesus! Last night I was telling my husband, David how amazed I was at the number of people who had read it and he said so simply, "That's what happens when God's involved." That is absolutely right! I am not bragging on myself.... but God! He took my story, that to me is ugly and shameful, and used it for His good.
Not only have over 1,250 (and still climbing) read my story but several people (many strangers until now) have reached out to me and sent me private messages to thank me because they needed to hear it or knew someone else who needed to hear it. I just LOVE how God works and to think I have been fighting God for several months about sharing it so publicly. I even got a devotional one day several months back that was titled, "Share Your Story." God was persistent and patient with me and I finally said 'yes' and quit running from what I knew He wanted me to do.
The purpose of this post is for the parents of young women who are walking in a season of life similar to what I was in. While I don't know (yet) what its like to parent a teenage girl (Lord help me when my time comes), I do know what its like to be that teenage girl and from that point of view I would like to give you parents a little insight and encouragement.
First of all, in my blog I mention searching for someone to love me and give me purpose. My search wasn't because my parents didn't love me enough. I was raised in an amazing home. I never saw my parents argue and to date they have been married over 40 years. They gave me anything and everything they could and I cherish them and what they sacrificed to raise me and provide for me. But parents.... that isn't enough! You can love your child with everything in you but the fact of the matter is we all have a need for love that no one other than Jesus himself can fulfill. We were created so that only God can truly satisfy our souls and quench our thirst with living water. We were made for Him and your children and my children were His first! I honestly think my parents had to just let go and let God!
I don't mean to discourage you in saying that you can't love them enough but I don't want to deceive you into thinking if you just love them and do everything perfect they will not stray. Did my parents do everything perfect? Probably not.... they aren't Jesus. But they couldn't change the fact that I was born a sinner and was going to be tempted by the Devil. I truly believe that God had a testimony that He needed to let me live out (we all have one) and He knew back before all the mess I got myself into that one day I would share my story and He would use it for His glory.
Secondly, the very last people I listened to was my parents (of course they were right all along). No stubborn teenager or rebellious young adult wants to do what their parents want them to. Sorry.... its just a fact and I was no different. The one thing I do wish and maybe could have impacted me is if I had a young woman (older and wiser than me obviously) to sort of mentor me and pour into my life. I really think quit possibly I may have listened if it had come from someone like that. Just an idea and maybe your daughter wouldn't even listen then but I really believe it would have helped me.
Lastly, don't be afraid to not be your daughter's best friend. There were things my mom said no to and I gave her the fight of her life. There were several very rough years between my mom and I. I was very stubborn and determined to do what I wanted to do. But, she was my mom and her job was to give me guidance against all odds. Can I give you some major encouragement in this area? Yes.... my mom and I fought, yelled at each other, and I believe I even told her I hated her at one time (sorry Mom). BUT now we are so close and she is literally my best friend! Coming from a former rebellious teenage girl.... she doesn't hate you and one day she will look back and be grateful for what you did for her. I adore my mother and love her fiercely and I regret what I put her through.
So whats the answer to make sure your teenage daughter doesn't take the path I did? Honestly, I don't know! I know that's not very encouraging. But I don't think my parents could have kept me from the path I chose. I had to make my own mistakes and learn from them and by the grace of God I survived it and now have a testimony to tell that hopefully will reach young girls.
As a parent myself to an almost 6 year old boy and a 2 1/2 year old little girl I can tell you I already feel the pressure for my kids to look and act perfect. As parents, especially us moms, we place our worth on how well our kids behave or if they say the right things and act the right way. As a home school mom its especially tough when it comes to how smart my kids are and what they are learning. Society makes us feel like we have to be a pin on pinterest or "look" like the perfect family. I try to never judge when I see a family with a wayward child because that does not define how good or not the parents parented them. Maybe the parents are making major mistakes and maybe not. It's not always the parents fault their children choose a defiant path. It wasn't my parents fault. They had me in church and I even made the true love waits commitment, to stay pure until marriage, publicly in front of church and wore a gold ring that had 'True Love Waits' inscribed on the inside of it. Yet I fell prey to the devil and his temptations.
Thank you to each and every one who read and shared my story. I pray that every eye that sees it will see Jesus for who he is and the transforming power of the Holy Spirit.
Also, can I just encourage you to share your story? I know we have all done stuff that we are ashamed of but someone right now may very well be struggling with something you struggled with and could benefit from what you went through and how far God has brought you. At the end of the day its not about us and our fleshly feelings of being ashamed but about Jesus and what he did for us on that cross. My story points to Jesus! What has Jesus done for you? I want to hear your stories! Email them to me, blog about it, post it, share it, write it down..... I promise you someone is needing to hear it right now.
"For 'everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved.' But how can they call on him to save them unless they believe in him? And how can they believe in him if they have never heard about him? And how can they hear about him unless someone tells them? And how will anyone go and tell them without being sent? This is why the Scriptures say, 'How beautiful are the feet of the messengers who bring good news!" Hebrews 10:13-15
Wednesday, March 19, 2014
Sunday, March 16, 2014
TRANSFORMED
I was raised in church from the time I was born and have heard the gospel more times than I can count. I voluntarily went to the front of the church during the altar call when I was about 7 years old and prayed the sinners prayer. I was baptized the next summer and over the following several years we were in church every time the doors were open. I joined the youth group when I got old enough, committed myself to daily quiet times, carried my Bible to school, prayed at the flagpole before class every morning, and shared my faith at the lunch table in middle school. It seemed like I was on the right path and growing in my relationship with the Lord. But was I or just doing what I was being spoon fed to do?
When I was in the 8th grade I remember thinking this christian thing was too hard. I was made fun of and was definitely not going to be one of the cool kids when I carried my Bible around everywhere I went. I gave up on God and began being defiant to my parents. I wasn't even really sure I believed God existed but I would have never admitted that with fear that if God was real I sure didn't want to risk going to hell.
I spent the next several years confused and searching. Searching for someone or something to make me feel whole and complete. I lost my virginity at 14. I thought he was the one I would marry one day and I didn't see any reason to wait. I thought my boyfriend was the key to my happiness. That's a lot of pressure to put on a broken human just like myself. My relationship with him lasted 3 years and when it ended I gave myself intimately to the next 3 guys I dated. I thought the only way they could love me and give me the joy I was searching for was to have a sexual relationship with them. Boy, was I wrong!
When I got out of high school I got into the party scene. Going to clubs, drinking about 4 nights out of the week, and doing drugs. I was still searching to fill a void. I got attention from guys easily and I used that to my full advantage and soaked up every bit of it thinking that would give me the purpose in this life I sought. I enjoyed the attention but at the end of the day I still wasn't fulfilled.
When I was 19, my relationship with David began. I was always very transparent with people especially guys that I wanted to date. So one night on the phone I told him of my past and the others that I had intimately been with. David told me that he was a virgin and I instantly felt unworthy. I can't even adequately describe the mixture of emotions I felt..... sadness, guilt, shame, embarrassment. I gave David an easy way out and told him that he didn't have to continue on with me because he deserved a girl who could offer him what I couldn't. His next statement to me literally changed my life. He said, "I don't care what you have done." It was as if God had spoken those words to me and in an instant my hard heart began to melt.
David and I were married the next year and I won't lie.... we didn't save our first time together for our marriage night. I thought my past had already ruined me and I knew he would be my husband one day so what was the point? The devil deceived me big time. I would give anything to go back and rewrite that part of my past. I was a stumbling block for David. He really wanted to wait for marriage but I convinced him it made no difference. LADIES....IT DOES MAKE A DIFFERENCE! If you hear anything from me hear this..... some of my biggest regrets and shame stem from my sexual past. Trust me on this.... IT IS NOT WORTH IT. Keep that part of yourself sacred and if anything do it for your future husband. I have caused mine a lot of pain because I didn't wait for him and I didn't view his virginity as a sacred gift to be cherished and worth waiting for until our wedding night.
Over the next almost 9 years of our marriage we church hoped. Prayed when we needed something and read our Bibles seldom at best. I never really understood the Bible all that well so it wasn't something I enjoyed picking up and reading. I don't really think I even viewed the Bible as God's words and stories that really happened and had application for my life today. They just seemed like child's stories I learned as a kid.
In August of 2012 we decided we needed to get on the right track and get involved in a church. I really wanted to raise my kids in church if anything to try to avoid rebellion against us when they got older. My motives didn't exactly include a life change on my part. I never imagined the transformation God had in store for me.
We went to Tri-Cities Baptist Church and instantly knew it was where God wanted us. Slowly God began to open my eyes to His truth and change me from the inside out. I was reading a book called Crazy Love by Francis Chan and in one of the chapters he writes about fake Christians and if there is really such thing as a lukewarm christian. Something came over me that night and my whole body began to tremble. I got down on my knees in my living room while the rest of the house was sleeping and cried out to God. I was so afraid that just maybe I wasn't really saved at all. If anything I just wanted to make for certain and to give my life to God more completely than I ever had before. I begged God for a clear understanding of His word and to give me a desire and passion to study my Bible like never before.
My passion for Jesus Christ and my desire to read my Bible has grown by leaps and bounds. It was a literal over night transformation. All of a sudden the Bible came alive to me and for once I began to get a clear picture of what God was trying to say to me. I started to see it not as just a history book with stories of the past but as a guide to all of life's ups and downs. My prayer life grew and slowly I began to be able to discern God's guiding and promptings. For once I saw Jesus as my best friend and not just this pretty awesome guy that lived a long time ago and I saw myself as lovable, forgivable, wanted, and significant.
Some say that miracles don't happen and God doesn't exist but I am telling you it is nothing short of a miracle the way my life and heart has changed. I see people so differently than I ever have before. We are all created with significant purpose. We were each made in the image of God..... the creator of the world. My heart is slowly being changed to see people the way Jesus does. To love people the way Jesus did and has called us to. We are so quick to see people for their sin and not their purpose and potential if they allowed the Holy Spirit to take control over their lives.
So, when was I truly "saved"..... at 7 years old or that night in my living room 1 1/2 years ago? Honestly, I don't know exactly. All I know is that I no longer doubt it and I finally moved out of the way and allowed the Holy Spirit to truly take hold of my heart and life and be my guide. I knew Jesus died on the cross to save me from my sins. But my heart never understood it the way it does now. Jesus was God himself... in the flesh. The unblemished sacrifice that was necessary to pay for all our sins so that we no longer have to be separated from God. The mere thought of that brings me to tears.
Today in church we sang the song posted below. It really sums up my story.
I don't write all this because I am proud of my past. It is actually quite the opposite. Its not fun to air your dirty laundry for everyone to see but I have felt God prompting me to get my story out there. Someone needs to hear it. The most important tool we have as christians to use in sharing our faith is our own personal stories. Whose life could your testimony transform?
"Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come." 2 Corinthians 5:17
When I was in the 8th grade I remember thinking this christian thing was too hard. I was made fun of and was definitely not going to be one of the cool kids when I carried my Bible around everywhere I went. I gave up on God and began being defiant to my parents. I wasn't even really sure I believed God existed but I would have never admitted that with fear that if God was real I sure didn't want to risk going to hell.
I spent the next several years confused and searching. Searching for someone or something to make me feel whole and complete. I lost my virginity at 14. I thought he was the one I would marry one day and I didn't see any reason to wait. I thought my boyfriend was the key to my happiness. That's a lot of pressure to put on a broken human just like myself. My relationship with him lasted 3 years and when it ended I gave myself intimately to the next 3 guys I dated. I thought the only way they could love me and give me the joy I was searching for was to have a sexual relationship with them. Boy, was I wrong!
When I got out of high school I got into the party scene. Going to clubs, drinking about 4 nights out of the week, and doing drugs. I was still searching to fill a void. I got attention from guys easily and I used that to my full advantage and soaked up every bit of it thinking that would give me the purpose in this life I sought. I enjoyed the attention but at the end of the day I still wasn't fulfilled.
When I was 19, my relationship with David began. I was always very transparent with people especially guys that I wanted to date. So one night on the phone I told him of my past and the others that I had intimately been with. David told me that he was a virgin and I instantly felt unworthy. I can't even adequately describe the mixture of emotions I felt..... sadness, guilt, shame, embarrassment. I gave David an easy way out and told him that he didn't have to continue on with me because he deserved a girl who could offer him what I couldn't. His next statement to me literally changed my life. He said, "I don't care what you have done." It was as if God had spoken those words to me and in an instant my hard heart began to melt.
David and I were married the next year and I won't lie.... we didn't save our first time together for our marriage night. I thought my past had already ruined me and I knew he would be my husband one day so what was the point? The devil deceived me big time. I would give anything to go back and rewrite that part of my past. I was a stumbling block for David. He really wanted to wait for marriage but I convinced him it made no difference. LADIES....IT DOES MAKE A DIFFERENCE! If you hear anything from me hear this..... some of my biggest regrets and shame stem from my sexual past. Trust me on this.... IT IS NOT WORTH IT. Keep that part of yourself sacred and if anything do it for your future husband. I have caused mine a lot of pain because I didn't wait for him and I didn't view his virginity as a sacred gift to be cherished and worth waiting for until our wedding night.
Over the next almost 9 years of our marriage we church hoped. Prayed when we needed something and read our Bibles seldom at best. I never really understood the Bible all that well so it wasn't something I enjoyed picking up and reading. I don't really think I even viewed the Bible as God's words and stories that really happened and had application for my life today. They just seemed like child's stories I learned as a kid.
In August of 2012 we decided we needed to get on the right track and get involved in a church. I really wanted to raise my kids in church if anything to try to avoid rebellion against us when they got older. My motives didn't exactly include a life change on my part. I never imagined the transformation God had in store for me.
We went to Tri-Cities Baptist Church and instantly knew it was where God wanted us. Slowly God began to open my eyes to His truth and change me from the inside out. I was reading a book called Crazy Love by Francis Chan and in one of the chapters he writes about fake Christians and if there is really such thing as a lukewarm christian. Something came over me that night and my whole body began to tremble. I got down on my knees in my living room while the rest of the house was sleeping and cried out to God. I was so afraid that just maybe I wasn't really saved at all. If anything I just wanted to make for certain and to give my life to God more completely than I ever had before. I begged God for a clear understanding of His word and to give me a desire and passion to study my Bible like never before.
My passion for Jesus Christ and my desire to read my Bible has grown by leaps and bounds. It was a literal over night transformation. All of a sudden the Bible came alive to me and for once I began to get a clear picture of what God was trying to say to me. I started to see it not as just a history book with stories of the past but as a guide to all of life's ups and downs. My prayer life grew and slowly I began to be able to discern God's guiding and promptings. For once I saw Jesus as my best friend and not just this pretty awesome guy that lived a long time ago and I saw myself as lovable, forgivable, wanted, and significant.
Some say that miracles don't happen and God doesn't exist but I am telling you it is nothing short of a miracle the way my life and heart has changed. I see people so differently than I ever have before. We are all created with significant purpose. We were each made in the image of God..... the creator of the world. My heart is slowly being changed to see people the way Jesus does. To love people the way Jesus did and has called us to. We are so quick to see people for their sin and not their purpose and potential if they allowed the Holy Spirit to take control over their lives.
So, when was I truly "saved"..... at 7 years old or that night in my living room 1 1/2 years ago? Honestly, I don't know exactly. All I know is that I no longer doubt it and I finally moved out of the way and allowed the Holy Spirit to truly take hold of my heart and life and be my guide. I knew Jesus died on the cross to save me from my sins. But my heart never understood it the way it does now. Jesus was God himself... in the flesh. The unblemished sacrifice that was necessary to pay for all our sins so that we no longer have to be separated from God. The mere thought of that brings me to tears.
Today in church we sang the song posted below. It really sums up my story.
I don't write all this because I am proud of my past. It is actually quite the opposite. Its not fun to air your dirty laundry for everyone to see but I have felt God prompting me to get my story out there. Someone needs to hear it. The most important tool we have as christians to use in sharing our faith is our own personal stories. Whose life could your testimony transform?
"Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come." 2 Corinthians 5:17
Tuesday, January 7, 2014
WHERE DO WE GO FROM HERE?
In late 2005, after being married for 2 years, David and I were pleasantly surprised to find out we were expecting our first child. I say surprised because I had myself pegged as the one that would have to try for months or years to be able to conceive. I am not really sure why I thought that..... maybe it was just a fear. So after only 2 months of not actively preventing it.....boom there it was! A positive pregnancy test! I remember David beaming with happiness and me....well.... I was scared to death. But I quickly got over the shock that hey.... I was actually pretty fertile after all and was excited to have my dream of motherhood coming true!
I was due on August 17th, 2006 but at our appointment at 9 weeks in January 2006, we went into the ultrasound room excited to see our baby bouncing around in my belly only to find out that it didn't have a heart beat. We were shocked, devastated, and disappointed. For the next year and a half we waited. Waited for God to say when we would begin our journey as parents. Waited until God worked out our finances to bring me home from work so I could raise our children full time. It was a horrible wait filled with many tears and questions. God allowed me to quit my job in March of 2007 and ironically on August 16th, 2007 (1 day shy of being exactly a year that our first baby was due) we found out we were expecting Austin!
That same shock, devastation, and disappointment is ever present in our lives right now. It feels as if we have suffered another loss. There are some high up officials in Ethiopia that are trying to put an end to international adoption. They want to promote inter-country adoption to a much greater degree. Which would be great in a perfect world but we are talking about one of the poorest countries in the world. People are dying over there of starvation and preventable diseases at alarming rates. They cannot place the almost 5 million orphans even with international adoption open. If this law is put into effect, it will be devastating for the orphans over there and devastating for the hundreds of families that are financially and emotionally invested in adopting a child from there. They may not close the country to international adoption but there will most likely be some laws changed to make it much more difficult.
So is this a door that God is closing or is this the Devil trying to discourage us? For us to change course right now would be heartbreaking. Our hearts are attached to Ethiopia. I feel like my family is there....like they are apart of me.... like they are my people! Maybe God wanted to create a place in our hearts for Ethiopia for other reasons and this is how he has chosen to do that or maybe he wants us to move forward and trust that he will take care of the rest. Right now we really have no idea how God wants us to proceed. We are waiting...... waiting for his response..... waiting for his guidance.
In the end we just want to do what God wants us to do. We know that He has a child picked for us and we just want to be on the path that He wants us on that will ultimately lead us to that child. Will you join us in prayer? Pray for Ethiopia and for God to move mountains on behalf of those orphans. Pray that he will burden the hearts of the officials and those making the decisions to do what is ultimately in the best interest of the orphans. Pray for us and the other families in limbo as we wait to hear what is going to happen. Pray for advocates in Ethiopia and around the world to speak up on behalf of orphans and vulnerable children. Pray for international adoption to remain open. More than I want you to pray for us and our decision..... I am asking and begging you to pray for the orphans that desire and deserve to be apart of a family.
"Faith is the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen; it gives us assurance about things we cannot see." Hebrews 11:1 NLT
I was due on August 17th, 2006 but at our appointment at 9 weeks in January 2006, we went into the ultrasound room excited to see our baby bouncing around in my belly only to find out that it didn't have a heart beat. We were shocked, devastated, and disappointed. For the next year and a half we waited. Waited for God to say when we would begin our journey as parents. Waited until God worked out our finances to bring me home from work so I could raise our children full time. It was a horrible wait filled with many tears and questions. God allowed me to quit my job in March of 2007 and ironically on August 16th, 2007 (1 day shy of being exactly a year that our first baby was due) we found out we were expecting Austin!
That same shock, devastation, and disappointment is ever present in our lives right now. It feels as if we have suffered another loss. There are some high up officials in Ethiopia that are trying to put an end to international adoption. They want to promote inter-country adoption to a much greater degree. Which would be great in a perfect world but we are talking about one of the poorest countries in the world. People are dying over there of starvation and preventable diseases at alarming rates. They cannot place the almost 5 million orphans even with international adoption open. If this law is put into effect, it will be devastating for the orphans over there and devastating for the hundreds of families that are financially and emotionally invested in adopting a child from there. They may not close the country to international adoption but there will most likely be some laws changed to make it much more difficult.
So is this a door that God is closing or is this the Devil trying to discourage us? For us to change course right now would be heartbreaking. Our hearts are attached to Ethiopia. I feel like my family is there....like they are apart of me.... like they are my people! Maybe God wanted to create a place in our hearts for Ethiopia for other reasons and this is how he has chosen to do that or maybe he wants us to move forward and trust that he will take care of the rest. Right now we really have no idea how God wants us to proceed. We are waiting...... waiting for his response..... waiting for his guidance.
In the end we just want to do what God wants us to do. We know that He has a child picked for us and we just want to be on the path that He wants us on that will ultimately lead us to that child. Will you join us in prayer? Pray for Ethiopia and for God to move mountains on behalf of those orphans. Pray that he will burden the hearts of the officials and those making the decisions to do what is ultimately in the best interest of the orphans. Pray for us and the other families in limbo as we wait to hear what is going to happen. Pray for advocates in Ethiopia and around the world to speak up on behalf of orphans and vulnerable children. Pray for international adoption to remain open. More than I want you to pray for us and our decision..... I am asking and begging you to pray for the orphans that desire and deserve to be apart of a family.
"Faith is the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen; it gives us assurance about things we cannot see." Hebrews 11:1 NLT
Monday, November 4, 2013
ADOPTION UPDATE
I know it has been some time since I gave an update on our adoption but there really wasn't a whole lot to tell. We got our Home Study packet and it took us around 6-8 weeks to get it all finished and mailed off to our agency.
From Dr.'s appointments to finger printing to online training to background checks to a gazillion questions about our pasts, our parents, our marriage, and our financial status....... Shew...... We are glad its in our counselors hands now. But we know that is just one small hurdle. Our next hurdle once our Home Study is completed is the dossier (which is pretty much a bunch of more paperwork for Ethiopia).
The biggest hurdle for me personally is the financial burden. God has thus far faithfully provided at just the right time but I am a planner and a control freak so you can only imagine how uncomfortable and unsettling this makes me feel. I like to be ahead of the game I guess you could say but God doesn't always work that way. My faith is definitely being put to the test and I am not proud to say that I have questioned God and doubted the path we are on most of the way. But at every turn God has been patiently reminding me to just trust Him & continue walking through the open doors in front of me.
As soon as our Home Study is approved we will owe our next payment of $3,550. We are probably about 2 months away from its completion and amazingly we have already raised about $2,500 of that amount!! But probably the most nerve racking thing for me right now is upon the completion of our dossier we will then owe 1/2 the Ethiopian country fee which is about $6,000. God is definitely teaching me how to trust Him more.
With all that being said I have to ask..... If cost wasn't an issue would YOU adopt a child?? Did you know that if ONLY 7% of the worlds Christian population would adopt just 1 child the orphan problem would be eradicated? I have people say to me all the time that they don't have that kind of money. Well guess what....... We don't either! But we believe that with God nothing is impossible and that He doesn't always call us to whats easy. God keeps reminding me that He didn't allow the "cost" of our adoption into the family of God to stop him.
"he predestined us for adoption as sons through Jesus Christ, according to the purpose of his will" Ephesians 1:5
I absolutely cannot wait till I lay my eyes on this sign again coming off the plane in Ethiopia! Pray for us as we walk through this process and pray that in all of this God's glory and grace will be made known.
Feel free to visit our fundraising page and share it.... www.youcaring.com/wallaceadoption.
From Dr.'s appointments to finger printing to online training to background checks to a gazillion questions about our pasts, our parents, our marriage, and our financial status....... Shew...... We are glad its in our counselors hands now. But we know that is just one small hurdle. Our next hurdle once our Home Study is completed is the dossier (which is pretty much a bunch of more paperwork for Ethiopia).
The biggest hurdle for me personally is the financial burden. God has thus far faithfully provided at just the right time but I am a planner and a control freak so you can only imagine how uncomfortable and unsettling this makes me feel. I like to be ahead of the game I guess you could say but God doesn't always work that way. My faith is definitely being put to the test and I am not proud to say that I have questioned God and doubted the path we are on most of the way. But at every turn God has been patiently reminding me to just trust Him & continue walking through the open doors in front of me.
As soon as our Home Study is approved we will owe our next payment of $3,550. We are probably about 2 months away from its completion and amazingly we have already raised about $2,500 of that amount!! But probably the most nerve racking thing for me right now is upon the completion of our dossier we will then owe 1/2 the Ethiopian country fee which is about $6,000. God is definitely teaching me how to trust Him more.
With all that being said I have to ask..... If cost wasn't an issue would YOU adopt a child?? Did you know that if ONLY 7% of the worlds Christian population would adopt just 1 child the orphan problem would be eradicated? I have people say to me all the time that they don't have that kind of money. Well guess what....... We don't either! But we believe that with God nothing is impossible and that He doesn't always call us to whats easy. God keeps reminding me that He didn't allow the "cost" of our adoption into the family of God to stop him.
"he predestined us for adoption as sons through Jesus Christ, according to the purpose of his will" Ephesians 1:5
I absolutely cannot wait till I lay my eyes on this sign again coming off the plane in Ethiopia! Pray for us as we walk through this process and pray that in all of this God's glory and grace will be made known.
Saturday, October 5, 2013
10 YEARS OF BLISS
In June of 2000 I was 16 years old and it was the summer before my senior year of high school. I was headed to Ponce Inlet, FL with my family and one of my best friends for our yearly beach vacation. The very last full day we were there it was rainy so we decided to head out to spend some time shopping and ate out for dinner that night. When we returned from dinner my mom looked out at the pool and said, "There are some boys in the pool." As a young teen who was crazy about boys (Lord help me if Alexa takes after me) I was ready to get out there and check them out.
Those boys turned out to be David and his younger brother, Jonathan along with their little sister, Amy who were at the beach for the weekend but lived in Orlando. David's opening line to me was...... " Where are you all from?" (My southern accent paid off big that day!) We spent the next few hours swimming in the pool with David and his siblings. The next morning he even got up early to watch the sunrise with us before we left to travel back to Tennessee. With a simple hug and exchange of email addresses....... we parted ways.
For 2 1/2 years we kept in touch through email, dated other people, and went on with our lives. At about this time 11 years ago, David sent me an instant message on the computer and asked if he could call me. That was when our friendship turned to romance and we planned a trip for him to come to Tennessee 2 days after Christmas. My heart skipped a beat as he got off that plane and as he was walking towards me at the airport my first thought was that this was who I was meant to marry.
For the next 5 months we dated long distance.... traveling back and forth once a month and spending every dollar we could gather on plane tickets. David began working to save money so he could move to be near me and in June of 2003 my Mom, Dad, & I made the 11 hour drive to Orlando, FL to move my love to Tennessee.
David moved into this little tiny studio apartment off of Memorial Blvd. and we began making plans to get married. On October 5th, 2003 at the Allendale Mansion in Kingsport, I said "I do" to my best friend and made a commitment to one another that we would spend our lives together.
The last 10 years has been so amazing and everything that happened to bring us together all those years ago is nothing short of a miracle. I am so proud and honored that God selected David to be mine.
David is the definition of prince charming....... thoughtful, loving, honest, hardworking, romantic, fun loving, an amazing father, selfless, and not to mention easy on the eyes! He gives without expecting anything in return, he loves with all his heart, and most importantly he loves the Lord. He takes his role as the head of our house very seriously and I can lay my head on the pillow at night with complete peace at where he leads us because he is seeking the Lord first in everything he does. It is the most amazing feeling to know that my husband is praying for me and our marriage on a daily basis. He is my love and even though I don't always feel like I deserve him, I know that God created him with me in mind and our divine meeting was in the plans way before our time.
So Happy 10th Anniversary to my prince charming, David!! I love you more now than ever before and I thank God for you everyday!
Those boys turned out to be David and his younger brother, Jonathan along with their little sister, Amy who were at the beach for the weekend but lived in Orlando. David's opening line to me was...... " Where are you all from?" (My southern accent paid off big that day!) We spent the next few hours swimming in the pool with David and his siblings. The next morning he even got up early to watch the sunrise with us before we left to travel back to Tennessee. With a simple hug and exchange of email addresses....... we parted ways.
For 2 1/2 years we kept in touch through email, dated other people, and went on with our lives. At about this time 11 years ago, David sent me an instant message on the computer and asked if he could call me. That was when our friendship turned to romance and we planned a trip for him to come to Tennessee 2 days after Christmas. My heart skipped a beat as he got off that plane and as he was walking towards me at the airport my first thought was that this was who I was meant to marry.
For the next 5 months we dated long distance.... traveling back and forth once a month and spending every dollar we could gather on plane tickets. David began working to save money so he could move to be near me and in June of 2003 my Mom, Dad, & I made the 11 hour drive to Orlando, FL to move my love to Tennessee.
David moved into this little tiny studio apartment off of Memorial Blvd. and we began making plans to get married. On October 5th, 2003 at the Allendale Mansion in Kingsport, I said "I do" to my best friend and made a commitment to one another that we would spend our lives together.
The last 10 years has been so amazing and everything that happened to bring us together all those years ago is nothing short of a miracle. I am so proud and honored that God selected David to be mine.
David is the definition of prince charming....... thoughtful, loving, honest, hardworking, romantic, fun loving, an amazing father, selfless, and not to mention easy on the eyes! He gives without expecting anything in return, he loves with all his heart, and most importantly he loves the Lord. He takes his role as the head of our house very seriously and I can lay my head on the pillow at night with complete peace at where he leads us because he is seeking the Lord first in everything he does. It is the most amazing feeling to know that my husband is praying for me and our marriage on a daily basis. He is my love and even though I don't always feel like I deserve him, I know that God created him with me in mind and our divine meeting was in the plans way before our time.
So Happy 10th Anniversary to my prince charming, David!! I love you more now than ever before and I thank God for you everyday!
"I found the one my heart loves" Song of Solomon 3:4
Friday, August 9, 2013
MY 30TH BIRTHDAY IN AFRICA
We began our LONG journey to Africa at about 5:30 in the morning on Tuesday, July 30th. Roughly 36 hours later we finally arrived at the lodge where we stayed for the week. So our first full day in Africa was ironically on my 30th birthday, August 1st.
I began my morning with my blow dryer blowing up. I obviously didn't realize the plug adaptor can only handle so much. Normally something like that would have quite possibly ruined my day but I laughed about it and considered it a blessing to not have to worry about my hair and the long process of styling it for a week.
David surprised me with birthday video messages from those closest to me. Wow.... that was really incredible! The hubs got big brownie points for that. Thank you to all of you who sent videos and tried to send videos. I know some of them didn't come through but it meant the world to me!! I believe I cried through most of them!
After breakfast we walked to Makwati school (I am not sure that is spelled correctly but it looks right so I'll go with it). Let me just say, that in itself was worth the 36 hours of traveling and leaving my kids for a week! I have never felt so much love from complete strangers before! They literally tackled us and surrounded us with beautiful, joyful smiles! If I ever doubted that I could love a child not biologically mine before that doubt was completely gone.....never to return. I instantly loved all those kids and soaked up their affection!
I have never been around kids that were so joyful & genuinely happy! They have nothing as far as possessions go yet they know a peace and contentment that I can only dream my kids would know. They wear mismatched, dirty clothes and many of them didn't even have shoes on. They didn't seem to care about any of that though. Their smiles were contagious and their affection made my heart swell! To say David was on cloud 9 is an understatement! He was totally in his element and it was obvious that children are definitely his calling!
The whole day I kept thinking about the child God has picked out for us to adopt! I am more excited and anxious now than ever before to dive into this process. The day before we left for Africa our adoption application was approved. Our next step is the home study but we have to come up with $2,100 before we can move forward. So far we have about $800 and I must admit I am stressing a little about the rest. Normally we would have that money tucked away but in our quest to completely rid our lives of car debt we used our savings to pay cash for David's car. I know God did that on purpose though because he wants to show us that he can and will provide for what he has called us to do. As soon as our home study is done we can apply for adoption grants. Hopefully we will be able to get some grants to help pay for the rest.
We have some things planned for fundraising but those are going to take some time to get together. I have some events this fall & winter that I am going to set up at and sell jewelry made by women in Africa. My car is up for sale and if we can get it sold we plan to buy something cheaper and use as much of the money from that as we can toward our adoption. David is going to try to find some side jobs like painting to help us raise money. We will do whatever it takes..... so everything at the Wallace's is for sale (with the exception of our kids...haha)! The life of a child is worth more to us than our "stuff." We trust God that everything will happen in his timing. So pray that God will give us patience!
For now I leave you with this verse that God showed me the morning after we visited the school.....
"Listen, my beloved brother, has not God chosen those who are poor in the world to be rich in faith and heirs of the kingdom, which he has promised to those who love him?" James 2:5
Acutally all of James 2 is good stuff! I encourage you to read it!
I began my morning with my blow dryer blowing up. I obviously didn't realize the plug adaptor can only handle so much. Normally something like that would have quite possibly ruined my day but I laughed about it and considered it a blessing to not have to worry about my hair and the long process of styling it for a week.
David surprised me with birthday video messages from those closest to me. Wow.... that was really incredible! The hubs got big brownie points for that. Thank you to all of you who sent videos and tried to send videos. I know some of them didn't come through but it meant the world to me!! I believe I cried through most of them!
After breakfast we walked to Makwati school (I am not sure that is spelled correctly but it looks right so I'll go with it). Let me just say, that in itself was worth the 36 hours of traveling and leaving my kids for a week! I have never felt so much love from complete strangers before! They literally tackled us and surrounded us with beautiful, joyful smiles! If I ever doubted that I could love a child not biologically mine before that doubt was completely gone.....never to return. I instantly loved all those kids and soaked up their affection!
The whole day I kept thinking about the child God has picked out for us to adopt! I am more excited and anxious now than ever before to dive into this process. The day before we left for Africa our adoption application was approved. Our next step is the home study but we have to come up with $2,100 before we can move forward. So far we have about $800 and I must admit I am stressing a little about the rest. Normally we would have that money tucked away but in our quest to completely rid our lives of car debt we used our savings to pay cash for David's car. I know God did that on purpose though because he wants to show us that he can and will provide for what he has called us to do. As soon as our home study is done we can apply for adoption grants. Hopefully we will be able to get some grants to help pay for the rest.
We have some things planned for fundraising but those are going to take some time to get together. I have some events this fall & winter that I am going to set up at and sell jewelry made by women in Africa. My car is up for sale and if we can get it sold we plan to buy something cheaper and use as much of the money from that as we can toward our adoption. David is going to try to find some side jobs like painting to help us raise money. We will do whatever it takes..... so everything at the Wallace's is for sale (with the exception of our kids...haha)! The life of a child is worth more to us than our "stuff." We trust God that everything will happen in his timing. So pray that God will give us patience!
For now I leave you with this verse that God showed me the morning after we visited the school.....
"Listen, my beloved brother, has not God chosen those who are poor in the world to be rich in faith and heirs of the kingdom, which he has promised to those who love him?" James 2:5
Acutally all of James 2 is good stuff! I encourage you to read it!
Friday, July 19, 2013
THE NEXT MEMBER OF THE WALLACE FAMILY
In my last post I announced that we are ready and feel led to begin our journey with adoption. At the time we were pretty certain we knew what route we were called to take we just wanted to make certain that was where God was truly leading us.
Well over the past few days I have spent a lot of time researching and watching adoption videos and my heart has been broken over and over again. The need is so large that I have been overwhelmed by it. Honestly, I have felt inadequate...... Like just adopting one isn't going to be enough.
There are many estimates out there (its really hard to get an exact number), but there is approximately 153 million orphans world wide. Just take a minute to wrap your head around that and by the way that number doesn't even include the kids who are orphaned and living on the streets as opposed to an orphanage or foster home. Could you imagine your own kids not having a mommy & daddy to love on them, tuck them in at night, care for them while they are sick, and comfort them when they have a bad dream? Could you imagine being abandoned by the people who are supposed to love you the most on this Earth? Could you imagine both of your parents suddenly dieing and having no one else to care for you?
For a long time (even 6 years ago when we first felt called to adopt), we have always been drawn to Africa. We went into our meeting with our adoption counselor with the countries narrowed down to 4 and after that meeting we felt stronger than ever that God was calling us to Ethiopia.
So what is it about Ethiopia that stirs our hearts so much....... Of the 153 million orphans world wide, 4.3 million of those reside in Ethiopia alone. It is one of the largest orphan populations in the world. One in 6 children die before their 5th birthday and 1 in 4 girls are raped. Ethiopia is one of Africa's poorest countries: over 80% of the 77 million people that reside there live below the poverty line, with 10 million of those facing starvation. Preventable diseases count for 60% of health problems. One of the top killers in Ethiopia is diarrhea. Those statistics are hard to swallow and understand when compared to the United States and the privileges that we have here. We are on a rescue mission to bring the child home that God has already picked out for us.
I would be lying if I said David & I have not had conversations
about the effects of interracial adoption and what we need to expect as
far as racism is concerned. It is so sad to me that this is still apart
of our culture. The other day on facebook, Pastor Rick Warren's post
said, "Racism is stupid. It's an insult to God, arrogantly implying that
God goofed-up when he chose to make us all different." I love that! If
you believe God created everything and everyone do you think he
appreciates us having such hatred toward some of his creation just
because their shade of skin is different than yours? There is only one
race and that is the human race and we are all beautiful in the eyes of
God.
So pray for us if you will as I know that we have some struggles ahead and pray for our child that God has reserved for us. We plan to raise every single penny needed to make this adoption happen. Our immediate need is for $550 for the formal application. We need this money as soon as possible. Currently there are only 10 spots left in the Ethiopia program (they only take so many at a time). We know God is in control and if one of those spots are meant for us then the money will come in. Immediately after the formal application is approved we need $2,100 to get our home study done. Then within a few more months we will owe $3,500. We won't owe anything more until we are referred a child which on average takes 3 years. So we will have some time to bring in about $30,850 more.
I have some fundraising ideas that I am excited to get started working on when we return from our mission trip. But I do wonder if we could possibly raise it all with facebook. What if 6,150 (or 37,000 for that matter) people on facebook donated just $1 to our cause? It will be nothing short of a miracle how God brings this money in. I have set up a fundraising website that people can go to and donate using paypal. Just follow this link..... www.youcaring.com/wallaceadoption
Well over the past few days I have spent a lot of time researching and watching adoption videos and my heart has been broken over and over again. The need is so large that I have been overwhelmed by it. Honestly, I have felt inadequate...... Like just adopting one isn't going to be enough.
There are many estimates out there (its really hard to get an exact number), but there is approximately 153 million orphans world wide. Just take a minute to wrap your head around that and by the way that number doesn't even include the kids who are orphaned and living on the streets as opposed to an orphanage or foster home. Could you imagine your own kids not having a mommy & daddy to love on them, tuck them in at night, care for them while they are sick, and comfort them when they have a bad dream? Could you imagine being abandoned by the people who are supposed to love you the most on this Earth? Could you imagine both of your parents suddenly dieing and having no one else to care for you?
For a long time (even 6 years ago when we first felt called to adopt), we have always been drawn to Africa. We went into our meeting with our adoption counselor with the countries narrowed down to 4 and after that meeting we felt stronger than ever that God was calling us to Ethiopia.
So what is it about Ethiopia that stirs our hearts so much....... Of the 153 million orphans world wide, 4.3 million of those reside in Ethiopia alone. It is one of the largest orphan populations in the world. One in 6 children die before their 5th birthday and 1 in 4 girls are raped. Ethiopia is one of Africa's poorest countries: over 80% of the 77 million people that reside there live below the poverty line, with 10 million of those facing starvation. Preventable diseases count for 60% of health problems. One of the top killers in Ethiopia is diarrhea. Those statistics are hard to swallow and understand when compared to the United States and the privileges that we have here. We are on a rescue mission to bring the child home that God has already picked out for us.
So pray for us if you will as I know that we have some struggles ahead and pray for our child that God has reserved for us. We plan to raise every single penny needed to make this adoption happen. Our immediate need is for $550 for the formal application. We need this money as soon as possible. Currently there are only 10 spots left in the Ethiopia program (they only take so many at a time). We know God is in control and if one of those spots are meant for us then the money will come in. Immediately after the formal application is approved we need $2,100 to get our home study done. Then within a few more months we will owe $3,500. We won't owe anything more until we are referred a child which on average takes 3 years. So we will have some time to bring in about $30,850 more.
I have some fundraising ideas that I am excited to get started working on when we return from our mission trip. But I do wonder if we could possibly raise it all with facebook. What if 6,150 (or 37,000 for that matter) people on facebook donated just $1 to our cause? It will be nothing short of a miracle how God brings this money in. I have set up a fundraising website that people can go to and donate using paypal. Just follow this link..... www.youcaring.com/wallaceadoption
"Pure and genuine religion in the sight of God the Father means caring for orphans and widows in their distress and refusing to let the world corrupt you." James 1:27 (NLT)
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